Disguise your own feet

Render them invisible to yourself and everyone else. That seems to be the premise of footgear sold as "Bill Jordan's Realtree hardwoods green HD men's slippers: high-definition mutli-[sic]terrain camo designed to perform in any season...at any distance." We were just looking for a pair of men's slippers, ideally moccasins, ideally available for immediate purchase, which ruled out year-round mail-order sources such as Bean's. These items tend to be seasonal, stocked for the holidays at the end of the year and sometimes also for Father's Day. We'd been striking out everywhere, including REI and Whole Earth Provision Company, when we tried Bealls and found these. The carton says that the slippers are manufactured (in China, of course) and distributed by SG Footwear, "Keeping in Step," of Hackensack, New Jersey. The camouflage pattern is a registered trademark of and used under license from Jordan Outdoor Enterprises, Ltd. Bill Jordan is Mr. Modern Camouflage, licensing his patterns and hiding feet and other objects and portions of the body in plain sight everywhere.